Now listen closely. Remember all that stuff you've heard in church about finding "God's will" for your life? FORGET IT. God's will for your life as of the day you got married was to be a good wife. In addition, as of the day you had children, God's will for you is to raise Godly children who will in turn raise Godly children. Period.

- Raising Godly Tomatoes [what used to be A Trip to the Woodshed, note the title changed here] [link]

I have a story to tell about this, coincidentally. I used to go church, right? Well, there was this lady there who was our youth counselour that followed a regime to wifehood like this. She told us all that we should obey our husbands all the time. I asked her, "Well. What if my husband was abusing me physically and verbally?" She then proceeded to jump down my throat and say angrily, "THEN YOU STILL LOVE YOUR HUSBAND! YOU DON'T LEAVE HIM! YOU PRAY!!!"

I have not really attended church since this. I see no reason for attending church with bigoted and idiotic people. I believe in God, yes, but I do not believe in forcing religon down people's throats. I believe also that your children will choose whatever religon they do. Just because you believe that the Christian God and Jesus is the only way may not mean your children will. My beliefs differ from my mother's, and my mother's differ from my grandma's.

Usually my younger children are all within eyesight and earshot of me in the same room, even if they are behaving well. Right now, my five youngest, preschoolers to preteens, are just around the corner from me. I know exactly what they are doing, and I can clearly hear them talking and interacting. Should they begin to bicker or get rowdy, I will stop them immediately. If they continue to misbehave, despite my verbal rebuke, I'll summon the offenders and sit them right next to me, allowing them to do nothing until they are bored stiff and motivated to obey. That would be more intensive Tomato Staking. Once under control and worthy of my trust again, I will direct them to some other activity closer to me than before, where I can see and hear them. That's still Tomato Staking.

This is an aspect of this I just do not like. Why would you do this to your children?? It's mothers and fathers who follow this regime who take their kids to Baptist churches or do homechurching and make their kids wear only "Christian" clothes (dresses for girl, pants and polos for boys, ugh) and make their children listen to daisywalking Jesus music.

... I think it is wrong (as in "sinful") to purposely try to look like a man or to deliberately wear men's clothing to that effect. Transvestitism is very wrong. The question to me, is whether or not all pants are "men's clothing".

WHAT?!! WHAT???!!

Question: How will my children learn to be good friends if I do not allow them to have "friends"?

Question: We have always been active in going to people's homes for dinner and game type nights but all the kid's are usually sent to another table in another room to eat and then go off to toy rooms to play together. If I understand the woodshed principles - children should be in your sight at all times - how do I apply this at someone else's home? I really believe this is a good thing to do and was very reassured when I read the "How to raise godly children" thread but I need some more practical example of the shelter and segregate ideas. Do you EVER let your kid's develop friendships outside the family? Even when they are older?

Sometimes, I wonder if I should even try to comprehend the stupidity at all. What the hell ever happened to just love your kids and try your best? I will never ever do this my children. I understand having your siblings as friends, because sometimes your siblings are the only people you get along with and feel comfortable with. But honestly, this parenting can only induce resent and hostility in the child. I cannot even look at this lady's bedamned site without betting angry. Stupid.

Just for good measure, links:

[link] Four things not to do to your children - it's really the best article I've read on how to not be an asshole to your kids. A lot of the symptoms I've seen with other parents, and it happens far more often than parents like to admit.
[link] Want even moar crazy? Well, here's the way stricter version of what Raising Godly Tomatoes does.

Have fun, kids!